25th may, yesterday, was phoebe's 2nd birthday. these few days, i kept on thinking abt what had happened to yuxuan. i realised that a lot of things will not happened as planned. i always plan ahead of time. i love making plans. i was supposed to be happy for phoebe's birthday. but i felt very sad as well.
initially, i planned that after celebrating phoebe's birthday in may, i would be looking forward to the arrival of yuxuan in early july. but unfortunately, my plans didnt worked out.
i cried quite often actually these days. sometimes even when im driving, while wating for the traffic lights to turn green, i will stare in space and start thinking of what had happened.
i always wonder why cant the doc give me medicine to cure the infection? why do they have to cut the stitch? isnt there something else that can be done to save yuxuan? yuxuan is so innocent. there is nothing wrong with the baby. so healthy, yet had to be taken away. why?